Friday, May 25, 2012

an evening in Pasadena.

So sometimes I have nights where I just feel like being alone. You too?

I had one earlier this week... I could have gone swimming with my sister & Marie... I could have gone to youth group with Shaun... but instead I did one of my most favorite things...

I had a date with Jesus in Pasadena.

Jesus dates are not that uncommon for me, but its rare that I'm able to do them in Pasadena because I don't like to spend money on gas... and parking... and of course frozen yogurt....

But this week I felt like it was a good thing.

The routine looks like this- I wait for my friends & family to go off to their evening endeavors, then I get in my car, turn on whatever music I am in the mood for, & pray to God, asking Him to meet me in a special way- like a Daddy & daughter date.

Then once I get to Pasadena I park on Colorado. (This week I didn't realize parking was free in the evenings, so I accidentally paid for parking... oops) Then I walk up and down the streets, watching the people, talking to homeless friends, and soaking up the feeling of being around fancy shops. Finally I go to 21 Flavors, get whatever amazing flavor combination they are offering up, & then walk over to Barnes & Noble and sit reading books for the next hour or 2. For me, its heaven.

I took some photos so you could be there with me... though its dark so they aren't super clear.
I was reading some things by Joyce Meyer & my froyo was "banana french toast" :) 

isn't it perfect? two of my favorite places at one intersection!
I guess its technically called "Old Pasadena"? don't know where new Pasadena is...
Well anyway, the point of me telling you this is not to make you crave frozen yogurt, or wish that you lived near Pasadena... actually I am more just wanting to share with you about my life. To let you know that we are not all that different.

One of the things I love about being alone with God is that it gives me an opportunity to be honest with Him about everything I have been wrestling with throughout the week...

like... insecurity
going to food for comfort.... haha frozen yogurt maybe??
wanting to be a better wife
feeling like my skin was broken out
wondering if i am qualified to do the things i am doing
wanting to be loved but feeling the sadness of some relationships that have ended... or seem like it
desiring to love God with my whole heart but realizing that lots of times I am distracted by other desires that seem all-consuming
hoping that i don't miss out on everything God created me for
--there's more but this is enough to give you the general idea

It's a bother that I struggle with all of this... and yet somehow God is so patient to listen to me, and teach me, and clean me up when I've gotten the 'mud' of sin on my heart.

Being alone with God fills me up, and reminds me to live in the moment. Often everything else in life feels so important, but when I sit down with Him, it all kind of dissolves... and I get my perspective back.

Its so good.

I guess I am just encouraging you tonight to get away with your Daddy, and have some time just you and Him. Go to a favorite place, enjoy a favorite treat, and let Him be the focus of your attention.

He is so satisfying.

Jesus answered, "Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life." John 4:13


Beppan said...

I love dates like that! Actually this inspired me too book one tomorrow =)
You are a true inspiration and a friend I wish lived at least on the same side of the ocean as I do!
Blessings / Rebecca Å

thefreespirit said...

Jess(: I love your blog. It's so encouraging and real... Thank you. Yeah. Just, thank you. Keep doing what you're doing. <3