tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-47316771040328220642024-02-01T20:56:34.096-08:00Jess HoverJess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.comBlogger379125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-40501053854609692232016-06-27T10:36:00.000-07:002016-06-27T11:22:13.318-07:00A letter from Karisse Schilling. "Dear 25 Year Old"<div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Karisse Joy Schilling</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>April 7, 1979 - May 18, 2016</b></span></div>
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Karisse was the joy girl. Not the cancer girl.<br />
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In September of 2007 I arrived to the Youth With a Mission campus in Los Angeles to attend a 6 month long Discipleship Training School. I was freshly 19 years old, eager to leave Colorado and intrigued by both Jesus and Los Angeles. Honestly I was probably more interested in LA than Jesus but God knew what was good for me and it all somehow landed me at YWAM LA. At the "Welcome Dinner" Karisse was the first person I talked to. Our first conversation was about our love for High School Musical and she won my heart by quoting Zac Efron.<br />
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Karisse quickly became a friend and a mentor in my life. She was someone I would go to for advice and encouragement. Even when we were just hanging out and laughing at Disney movies I was learning from her. She was also so positive and hopeful. She never acted like someone who had cancer. She was the joy girl, not the cancer girl. Despite being diagnosed over and over, and going through all kind of treatments from the time she was in her early twenties, cancer never monopolized our thoughts or conversations. We talked about it occasionally, but mostly it was just when she missed her mom and she was telling me about how Jesus had been faithful to take care of her after her mom passed away. Her mom died of cancer just a few weeks after Karisse was first diagnosed, and Karisse began her first cancer treatment the day after her mom's funeral.<br />
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Karisse was there when Shaun and I met. She loved Shaun from the start and was encouraging me to get to know him. We would talk about him over lunch dates in Los Angeles, and we even talked about him over a coffee date in Thailand when she came to visit my team in 2008. Karisse was the first person I called when Shaun asked me to be his girlfriend. She literally cheered.<br />
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Karisse lived an incredible life with the 37 years she was given. She was a missionary to 27 nations. She worked with IJM in Washington D.C. to help with major injustice issues around the world. She started a Justice ministry in Los Angeles to help see an end to human trafficking. Karisse was a blogger and an author. She even published a coloring book on Amazon for people to use when they are spending time with Jesus, she just wanted people to take time to rest, pray, and color in simple pages of swirls and scriptures. She was always making things more beautiful.<br />
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More than any of that though, what stands out to Shaun and I about Karisse was her extravagant love for people. She was a cheerleader of a friend. She spoke life and encouragement into our lives in moments when we really needed it, carving out time for coffee dates with me and sending us long Facebook messages reminding me how much she loves us and how much Jesus loves us and encouraging us to keep being faithful to the things God has called us to.<br />
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When I was 24 I decided to do this thing where I wrote friends of mine who were older and wiser, friends I wanted to be like when I grew up, and I asked them to give me advice about being 25. I was nervous about getting older and I thought it would be fun to not only receive their advice but then to post it on my blog so other friends could be blessed by it too.<br />
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Last night when I was going through old messages from Karisse I found her letter about turning 25. It is perfect and beautiful. So very Karisse. The odd thing is I never actually posted it on my blog and I have no idea why. Her response must have gotten lost in the midst of the other responses I received. I'm sorry I didn't post it back when Karisse was still here to see it but I am grateful I can share her advice now. I pray it impacts people even more deeply than it would have been then.<br />
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Karisse lived a good life. In fact she wrote in her will that she wanted us to wear bright colors and eat ice cream at her memorial because she lived such a good life. So that's what we did yesterday. We ate big bowls of ice cream and celebrated Karisse. Today I ask that you celebrate her again by reading her letter, taking her advice and even sharing it with a friend. It is written to 25 year olds but will speak to anyone.<br />
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Thank you so much. And thank you Jesus for Karisse. We are so grateful for her.<br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">"Dear 25 year old, </span><br />
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I now know some things that I wish I knew when I was 25 and I'd love to share them with you. Mainly I know that I am enough and worthy just the way that I am. I don't have to "do" certain things to have worth and value. The number on the scale does not reflect my value. It doesn't matter how much, or how little I weigh--my worth does not change! The ONLY place that I find true value is in who Jesus says that I am. And He says that I am worthy and beautiful and His princess. That is the value statement. I am enough. Any other message is an observation and does not hold power to destroy that identity.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">If I could go back and tell myself something on my 25th birthday, I would tell myself to enjoy each day and find beauty in what it holds. I would remind myself not to panic about being single, but to instead find the good and blessings in every day. Each day holds something beautiful, even if it's the worst day of our life. Find the beauty and hold onto it. Focus on the good, and not the bad. Stop looking at that scale and comparing yourself to others!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">A book that I wish had been written when I was 25 is "God Loves Ugly" by Krista Black. Seriously, it has changed my life. My perspective on myself, God and identity everything. If you only read one more book, you need to read this one. Read it slowly and do the homework at the end of each chapter. I "ugly cried" through the last 3 chapters in a good, healing type of way. Seriously, amazon.com right now. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">A movie I think you would love... Well, there are so many! I love a wide variety for various reasons and can quote almost all the ones I've seen! If you haven't seen "While You Were Sleeping" yet, just go ahead and buy it. It's a good time. If you haven't seen "Penelope" yet just buy that one too. The cinematography and design is absolutely stunning and the message is quite lovely too.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">I think that we place more importance on our appearance than we should. Seriously, love God and love people. I think that's the basics of life. I think that worrying about my weight, feeling fat and having bad body image has stolen a lot from me. It's stopped me from trying things I otherwise would have and has stolen joy from my life. Let's not hate the art God created in us. Everyone looks different, and that's lovely. Your beauty will come from your eyes, your choices, your words etc. That's what people remember. Now, let's be healthy. Let's put quality food in our body and use those muscles etc---but let's not put so much energy into hating our bodies and comparing ourselves. Don't let that rob you. Love God, love people. I say it again. Everyone is longing for love. Let God fill your heart with his message of worthiness--and know that you are "enough" just as you are. Bring that overflow to the people around you who are drowning and longing to believe that they are enough too. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">Have fun whenever you can, because life is short! 25 feels old, but it's really not! Live your life in a way that allows you to hear what God is saying to you and obey it. Smile, laugh, invest in people. Take a lot of pictures (and print them!). Save some money! Even if it's just $1-$5 a week start saving it in a jar if you have to! Collect all your spare change in a jar because it will add up! Sell a few things and get an "emergency" fund. Always keep $1,000 in savings (as best you can) so that when emergencies happen you don't immediately go into debt. Oh, and don't go into debt! Don't spend more than you have, but don't stress about every coffee you buy either! Every once in a while think about yourself at the age of 50 or 60 and see if you would be glad that this is what you did with your life. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">A fun idea is to do a 25 things before 26 list this year. (and then 26 things before I turn 27. And then 27 things before I turn 28 etc) Make a few big goals and a lot of small ones and cross them off as you do them. You could even take a picture of each thing and keep it in a little album (ex: go to a concert, fly on a plane, learn to crochet, learn a new recipe etc). Also, put a little money aside each month so that you have some fun money to celebrate your 30th! Get a few friends together and go on a cruise, or a trip or to Disney--and then you have the funds ready.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">Life is unpredictable. Control is an illusion. We think we have control of our lives, but we really don't. We don't know what tomorrow holds, so enjoy today. Love those around you today. Choose to invest in your faith and know God more. Choose to trust God when bad things happen. It's ok to be upset, angry, sad etc. be honest with how you feel (God knows anyway). Don't live your life to impress others and for pete's sake, stop comparing yourself to others! What a waste of time and energy! Learn to love the YOU that God gave you. Besides, you'll be all wrinkley in 40 years and you'll look back at this time and wonder why you didn't love the young body that you had! When you feel attacked, mess up, are having a fat day etc, chant to yourself "That's an observation, not a value statement" and remind yourself that you are enough and worthy as you are. Oh, and surround yourself with pretty things and quotes and Bible verses to help you remember that. Buy yourself flowers sometimes whether or not you have a significant other. (and NOT having a significant other does NOT diminish your worth or say something negative about you!) Now, go hug someone. Everyone needs a hug.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">Also. Wear sunscreen EVERY SINGLE DAY. It protects you from wrinkles. (And cancer!) </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">I rambled a lot!!! Love you! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">K" </span></div>
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Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-62464410271082929122016-06-03T23:08:00.001-07:002016-06-03T23:08:05.317-07:00TRAVEL DIARY: Jamaica<div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/CQ1c_sdshnE" width="480"></iframe></div>Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-39848398981891227362016-06-03T23:07:00.001-07:002016-06-03T23:07:14.213-07:00Family Vlog - We went to Banff, Canada! (Part 2)<div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/gIjdvhwlUV4" width="480"></iframe></div>Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-57732163797378176302016-05-10T17:33:00.001-07:002016-05-10T17:33:39.883-07:00Family Vlog - We went to Banff, Canada! (Part 1)<div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/6lUJLc7ONLQ" width="480"></iframe></div>Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-84720673236762597662016-05-10T17:30:00.000-07:002016-05-10T17:30:02.481-07:00Canada, Eloise is 10 Months, and Living a Connected Life.<div style="text-align: center;">
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">I just spent the last two weeks in Canada with my sister Meredith. She and her husband David had a baby girl on March 25th so Eloise and I went to meet her and help Meredie learn to do life with a baby. It's kind of ironic I would be doing that considering just ten months ago it was Meredith by my side teaching ME how to do life with a baby, but life is funny like that and sometimes you just need a sister to remind you of the stuff you already know.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">Meredith is an amazing mama. Her daughter, Loewy Elisabeth, is darling and tiny, but somehow her farts are worse than Shaun's. No exaggeration. That little honey can stink up a room. Her poo is so bad I almost gagged on one occasion, and that is saying a lot because I'm surrounded by unshowered skateboarders most days. She is breastfed too... which makes her stink all the more mysterious.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">Shaun was in Panama for the first week I was in Canada. He and a team of staff from Calling All Skaters were there doing an outreach with our friend Dave Terranova. They gave Dave's skatepark a facelift and hosted a couple different skate events, investing in the young skaters & sharing the love of Christ with them.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">My Dad booked a last minute trip to Canada to see us so he arrived the day before Shaun did. It was perfect. My brother-in-law was able to take a few days off work and we headed to the mountains for a weekend getaway. Banff is a glorious place. It looks like Switzerland, feels like Colorado, and sounds like Australia because almost everyone working there is from "down under."</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">Lake Louise might be my favorite place I've ever been. It's definitely up there. Right next to Lake Vevey in Switzerland and Manhattan Beach in LA. Manhattan Beach isn't really the same caliber of place as the others but being there does something to my heart that reminds me of heaven. It's just a good place. Lake Louise reminds me of heaven too. I kept joking about feeling high there. Really though, who needs to smoke weed when you can get Rocky Mountain High? Not me. No thanks.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">I've been on a writing hiatus. Not by choice. I feel like it just happened to me. Between being a mom, making YouTube videos, serving Beauty Arise, and attempting to writing a book (errr... That process is going soooo slowly that I feel silly even including it in here...) I just haven't know when to write or even what to say. But I don't think it's good for me. So here I am. Jumping back on the blogging bandwagon.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">Eloise is 10 months old now. Her hair is long and her big gummy smile finally gained two little pearly whites last week! Her first ones. She pulls up on everything and loves to eat. She also still loves to nurse. If she chose her own diet it would consist of breast milk, French fries, and lots and lots of meat. She loves meat. Chicken. Beef. Pork. She went through a refried beans phase but it was short lived because she got pretty sick one week and after that she didn't want them anymore. She has flown 22 times and been to two nations outside the U.S. In May it will be 3 because we are heading to Jamaica as a fam with our friend Carly.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">Life over here has been pretty wonderful but I find that it's still so easy to get caught up in things that don't really matter. I feel distracted often. For some reason distraction is comfortable for me. Instead of engaging with the people and things that matter most I find myself passing time scrolling through my Instagram feed or plugging away at household chores that really could wait till later. Lately I've been longing for connection. Connection with God first. I don't want to talk about Him by reciting old stories & recalling things from years past. I want fresh experiences with Jesus. Fresh connection. And with Eloise. She is growing so fast I don't want to miss it. I don't want to spend my days looking forward to her next nap. I want to connect with her when she is awake. Pray for her. Play with her. And with Shaun. We are both busy people. We are "people people" so we are constantly doing things with others, and even though we are together often I still feel like it's possible for me to miss him too. Like we can be together but still be somewhere else in our heads. Thinking about work stuff or social media stuff. I want to be present with him, pursuing him and pursuing God with him.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">When I make videos on YouTube I try to imagine you. The viewer. I don't want to make videos just to feel like I did something. I want to bless you. I want you to be encouraged and strengthened in your life. I want you to be entertained. So instead of pursuing success online I'm trying to pursue connection there too. I want to connect with my content and I want to connect with you through it.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">Connection. That's how I'll end this post. Right now, this week, I'm pursuing connection. By disconnecting with fruitless activities and reconnecting with the meaningful. My phone is basically out of commission after 9pm. And I won't be using it in the morning until I've spent some time in the Bible. It doesn't have to be a lot of time. Just some time. I'm trying to be better about using my planner too, that way I am more organized and better at prioritizing.. On that note I am convinced I have the best planner EVER and I seriously think EVERYONE should get one. It is SO cute and encouraging and helpful. It even reminds me to drink more water. Go get one. </span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;"><a href="http://corieclarkshop.com/">http://corieclarkshop.com/</a></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">So that's all. A hodge podge of thoughts from my heart to yours. And now a hodge podge of photos from our trip because they are too good not to share. I'll be printing them out and adorning my house with them. Follow us on snapchat to see if I really do it. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">"The Shaun Hover Reality Show" -- Snapchat: Shaun Hover </span></span></div>
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Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-59159955918081013802015-12-28T15:45:00.001-08:002016-01-01T20:51:50.617-08:00How We Met - Our Story (a video)<div style="text-align: center;">
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<iframe width="320" height="266" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/5GGzw8gx24o/0.jpg" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/5GGzw8gx24o?feature=player_embedded" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></div>
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
This video was filmed & edited by Becca Prins :) </div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
She is the very best! </div>
Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-37052068913540082542015-12-26T15:03:00.001-08:002015-12-28T15:41:47.133-08:006 Months a Mom. (with Christmas photos)<div style="text-align: start;">
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<br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">The night Eloise was born was the night I
learned to change a diaper. I had watched a handful of diapers get changed over
the course of my life and I probably changed a diaper or two a long time ago
when my mom was running a little daycare in our home, but I <i>really </i>learned
how to do it from a nurse at Glendale Adventist who kindly walked me through it
at midnight on June 25th. She also walked me through it at </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">2am</span><span style="font-family: inherit;">, </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">4am</span><span style="font-family: inherit;"> and </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">6am</span><span style="font-family: inherit;">. Because in
my nervousness and fatigue I called her for help every single time Eloise
needed to be changed, I also called her for help with swaddling Eloise. I don’t
know if she had any other patients that night but if she did I should probably
apologize to them for hogging all of her attention. She was an angel and I’m grateful
we were admitted into the maternity ward during her shift because the nurses
after her weren’t nearly as patient with me. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">During the first week of Eloise’s life I learned how to push a stroller. I
thought it would come naturally but no, like diaper changing, it is a skill and
it required both learning and practicing. My classroom for stroller pushing was
</span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Foothill
Boulevard</span><span style="font-family: inherit;">
and the lobby of the Sunland Starbucks. I would walk up Foothill toward the
coffee shop, nervously trying to maneuver around cracks in the sidewalk because
I was afraid of jolting the baby, then I would arrive at the door of Starbucks
and attempt to open the door with one arm while pushing the stroller through
with my other arm and hip. I was sure people would offer to help but I quickly
discovered that people don’t assume moms need help, they assume we’ve got it,
but unfortunately... I really didn’t have it. I was elated the day I watched
another mom walk into Starbucks with her stroller and as usual nobody helped
her, but she wasn’t phased, because instead of trying to go through the door
front-in she turned around and backed herself and the stroller through the open
door. It looked easy, made perfect sense, and I was thrilled because that woman
had changed my life. New moms: back your stroller through doors, it is wayyyy
easier! Unfortunately even after I learned the art of backing my way through
entrances I still struggled with bumping into everyone and their chairs as I
approached the cash register, but it seems that laughter and a bit of
apologizing is sufficient for those situations. I found it also helps to show
any potentially irritated people my baby, because only a Scrooge would stay
annoyed at the sight of sweet Eloise.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I
had mistakenly assumed that all other moms felt sure of themselves as they
toted their babies on their hips while tackling things like grocery shopping,
dinner making and posting instagram photos of their perfectly braided hair, but
it's simply not true. While I’m sure there are a few moms who feel totally sure
of themselves, most moms are not, and I’m one of them. I will say that as
Eloise has grown, so has my confidence in parenting. I’ve never I felt like I
know what I’m doing but I’ve grown more comfortable with the idea that my best
guesses are good enough. Being that babies can’t talk yet our great challenge
as moms is to interpret their sounds and squirms and tears, and then take
appropriate action to soothe, nurture and distract them into feeling better.
That’s no easy feat. It seems that every 3 weeks-ish Eloise is in a new stage
of development which gives me about 2 and a half weeks of fumbling around until
I finally get a grasp on her current “stage” and begin feeling like a
professional mom, lasting about 3 days until Eloise changes again and I’m back
in the familiar place of... “Oh crap ... I have no idea what I’m doing.”</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Today Eloise is 6 months old. She says “Da-Da” and wiggles around a lot. She
loves to stand, is most content around people and is perfectly happy being
passed around a room. She still is strictly breast-fed, though last night Shaun
and I picked up some jars of baby food to begin the adventure of real food. I’m
not looking forward to smelly poop and her potential constipation but she seems
very interested in my meals these days so I know that it's time. Her hair is
cute, it looks a bit like a comb-over because it grows faster on top than it
does everywhere else, but I trimmed it a little and have her in headbands most
days so it works out. It has also gotten really light so it's basically a
reverse ombre - light at the roots and dark on the ends. She is so hip. She
smiles with a big open mouth and attempts to laugh all throughout the day. The
best time to play with her is right when she wakes up because she talks and
giggles and it's about the cutest thing you’ve ever seen. I have never bought
her an outfit because everyone gives her clothes, but I’m most tempted to do it
when we are in Baby GAP. Are you kidding me with those clothes? They are way
too cute. Several people have said Eloise should be a Baby GAP model, and if
that means they would give her a few free outfits I am all in. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">For the last 6 months I have been needy. I have needed sleep and support and
friends and prayers. I’ve needed somebody to open the door for me when I’m
pushing our stroller and I've needed encouraging text messages reminding me
that motherhood gets better. I have needed long hugs, special laundry detergent
for sensitive skin, and a dairy-free diet to ease Eloise’s achy tummy. I’ve
needed someone to watch the baby while I shower and someone to wash my shower
while I watch the baby and I’ve needed things like a stroller, a carseat, and a
crib to make life with Eloise possible. I've also needed Shaun more than ever.
He has been nothing short of a dream husband, caring for Eloise and I both with
an ease that makes it screamingly obvious he was born to be a dad, and while I
know the demands of my neediness have been weighty, he has never made me feel
guilty for my occasional melt-downs and ongoing insecurity in my new role. He
has given me space and grace to come into motherhood in a way that best suits
me, without comparing to me to anyone else, and I pray often that Eloise
marries a man like her Daddy.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">My favorite part about today being Eloise’s half birthday is that it is
Christmas. It couldn’t be more perfect. Before Jesus came to earth people
prophesied about Him saying He would be called Immanuel, meaning God with us.
In the depths of my neediness that is exactly what I’ve longed for. My heart
has yearned for God to be with me as I’ve taken on each of Eloise’s new stages,
hoping His joy would fill me when the tasks of mama-hood feel lackluster,
praying extra hard for Him to give me wisdom on the nights when Eloise won’t
fall asleep and I can’t figure out why. Every evening before bed I sit in a
rocking chair in the corner of Eloise's room and I nurse her. The room is
quiet, smelling like lavender, and her warm little fingers pinch the skin on my
chest as she drinks. It is in this time that I dream about everything she will
grow up to be. Some nights I feel peaceful but many nights I feel afraid. My
mind reels about things like terrorism and the always uncertain future, and
again my neediness surfaces. I am desperate for God to quiet my anxious heart,
and He does, in Immanuel. Christmas serves as a marker in our yearly calendar
to remind us that God is not far off, He is near and He is generous. My
neediness draws me to God in the same way that Eloise's hunger leads her to my
chest and it is good. In love God gave His Son for us, and in love I give my
daughter back to Him, raising her to know Him and trusting in Him along the
way.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">It is fitting that from now on and always I will spend Eloise’s half-birthday
celebrating the birth of my Savior, the One who gave me the gift of motherhood
and the One who is with me as I learn to walk it out. </span><br />
<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="text-align: center;"> </span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Thank you Jesus for coming to save us, </span></span></span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">thank you for
Eloise Marie and thank you for meeting my needs. </span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">I love you. </span></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Photos by @sarahgrunderphotography </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
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</xml><![endif]-->Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-56924106978168244102015-10-19T11:16:00.001-07:002015-10-19T11:16:25.033-07:00How to stay strong! (when you feel weak!)<div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/J3Yo87TCisk" width="480"></iframe><br />
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<img alt="post signature" class="left" src="http://i1225.photobucket.com/albums/ee381/JessicaHover/376d9f65-c053-4361-b16e-c83e6bec0532.png" /></div>Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-57531846138724155832015-09-22T09:03:00.002-07:002015-09-29T20:59:31.356-07:00I don't love being a mom.<div style="text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">5 week old Eloise. So stinking cute. She loved when her Daddy would touch her head.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Eloise is almost 3 months old now and we love her so much that we joke about having 50 kids just because we want more of her around. But back when she was about a month old I wrote this blog post and then didn't share it, probably because I was slightly ashamed of my feelings. But upon rereading it today I have decided it's worth sharing, even if its just for the purpose of me remembering my journey as a new mama. I love being a mom now, but I didn't love it then. And that's okay.</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Thanks for stopping by! More blog posts to come. :) </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">"Do you love being a mom?" </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Today marks 5 weeks and 2 days of being a Mama. I know I was a Mama while Eloise was in my tummy too but right now I’m only going to talk about what life has been like since we started hanging out with our daughter outside the womb.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">So life as a new mom has been ...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Well that’s the thing ...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I’m having a hard time finding the right words to describe the experience of being a new mom. My heart so desires to be authentic, I want to be truthful and honest. I want to be positive while also being a person who doesn’t just share my highlights with you. I want to share my not-so-high-lights too, because I feel like there’s power in that. Especially now, in a world and culture where everything is a photoshopped and filtered version of reality. But this has been a struggle for me. For example, I haven’t known what to post on Instagram this week. Firstly that’s because my life is all baby right now and I feel like that might bore some people. But more than that, I just don’t know how to capture both the beauty and battles that motherhood has been for me. I fear that if I only post the happy moments then I’ll become a superficial version of myself, living to convince you of a perfect life that doesn’t actually exist. On the other hand though I don’t want to bring anybody down so this causes me to shy away from posting anything that could be perceived as complaining, because obviously I’m not trying to pollute anybody’s feeds either. This ultimately has left me silent.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">So many people have asked me questions over the past few weeks, things like, “Do you love being a mom?”... “Are you in heaven?”... “Do you just melt when you look at her?” And of course the answer they are expecting is the answer I am going to give. Yes. Yes. And yes. But that’s where the struggle happens. Because what I also feel, apart from being in heaven and melting at the sight of my darling little girl, is a whole whirlwind of other emotions. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">When Eloise was 8 days old someone said sweetly, “I bet you can’t even remember what life was like before she was born.” I nodded and laughed as if to communicate agreement. But not because I actually agreed. I laughed because if I would have thought too much into it I probably would have started crying. Of course I still remembered what life was like before she was born. I remembered what it felt like to sleep. I remembered the ease I had in moments when I felt like getting up and leaving the house. I remembered the creativity and motivation I had to write and make videos. I remembered having sex and I remembered when my boobs weren’t milk-machines, and I certainly remembered when I didn’t bleed every time I went pee. Forgive me for being so graphic but that was my reality at 8 days postpartum. So when the suggestion was made that I couldn’t remember life before the baby, this heaviness of guilt came over me. Was I not supposed to remember life before the baby? Had I somehow failed this motherhood thing already because I wasn’t so overcome with butterflies of love for my little one that I still had memory of the way things were before her? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">At 5 weeks old things have gotten easier, just like my friends promised they would. I have gotten more confident, Eloise has gotten more sturdy, and my hormones have simmered down which is probably the best news of all. However I still struggle to know how to communicate what I’m experiencing with honesty but without sounding like I’m not enjoying it. Earlier this week I was asked again if I loved being a mom, and of course I smiled and said yes. But last night I was thinking about it and I decided that if I’m going to be perfectly honest then I need to refine my answer, because actually I don’t love being a mom yet. Not in the way that they mean when they ask. I still think being a mom is scary a lot of the time and I haven’t quite found a rhythm for how to do life with a baby. I’m still sleepy and un-showered most days, my parenting is made up of the guess and hope technique... guess what to do ... hope that it works. And literally every day presents me with new challenges to overcome. So in that sense, no, I really don’t love this Mama role quite yet. I’m grateful for it. I wouldn’t change it for anything. And not a single part of me regrets getting pregnant. In fact I already dream about having more babies so we can do this all again. But still, I don’t love it. Not like I loved traveling to Barcelona or working backstage at fashion week or even leading a ministry. I don’t love being a mom like I loved doing those things. Not yet anyway.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">But in processing all this I realized something else too. Though I don’t love being a mom yet, if you ask me if I love my little girl, the answer is an all consuming YES. I love everything about her with everything that I am. I even love her cry. On my hardest days, the ones where she cries and I cry and she cries some more, I still love her more than I knew I could love anything ever. I love holding her in my arms and snuggling her precious body. I love her bright eyes and the funny faces she makes. I love that she farts loud like her Dad and I love that people think she looks like Shaun and my little sister. I do still remember life before Eloise but I don’t desire life without Eloise. Actually if I think too much about ever having to say goodbye to her I end up in tears. She is a gift beyond gifts and as tough as it is to be a mama sometimes, I sincerely pray that every woman in my life gets to experience the treasure of being a mom. It has been the best and hardest thing I’ve ever done. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">So that’s where I’m at today. I don’t love being a mom yet, not in the excited emotional way anyway, but I love Eloise and I love that I get to be <i>her</i> mom. And I think that’s okay. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">One day when Eloise grows up and has a baby of her own I want her to know that she doesn’t have to love being a mom right away. She might, and that would be wonderful, but if she doesn’t then she is <i>not</i> failing. The most meaningful things we will ever do require sacrifice, and often sacrifices don’t feel good until later on, when we have realized all that we gained through laying our lives down. </span></div>
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Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-12206380713389192512015-08-16T20:32:00.001-07:002015-08-16T20:32:18.262-07:00How Shaun's love for Eloise is teaching me about God. (video)<div style="text-align: center;">Hi friends! Yesterday during on of Eloise's naps I was thinking about God and how much I'm learning about His love through watching Shaun care for Eloise. I decided to turn on the camera and share my thoughts out loud in case they could be an encouragement to somebody. I didn't spend too much time making this video so it's nothing fancy, but I'm praying that if anyone needs to see it then they'll find it. We will be posting more videos soon. Grateful for you and hope you have a wonderful week. </div><br /><br />
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<img alt="post signature" class="left" src="http://i1225.photobucket.com/albums/ee381/JessicaHover/376d9f65-c053-4361-b16e-c83e6bec0532.png" /></div>Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-34788862382512353102015-08-03T12:52:00.001-07:002015-08-03T14:26:06.745-07:005 things I've learned from 5 weeks of being a Mom<div style="-webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody;">
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><b>Number one. I've learned to apply eyeliner with one hand.</b> </span><br />
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">In fact I've learned to do a whole lot of things with one hand because often times baby girl just wants to be held and she doesn't care if her Mama's got things to do. I'll probably start putting her in the baby carrier more so I can wear her on my chest and still have both hands free, but until then I'll continue tackling life Bethany Hamilton style. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><b>Number two. I've mastered the art of getting ready quickly.</b> </span><br />
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">I thought I was pretty good at that in the past because I lived with a whole bunch of low maintenance skateboarders who don't tolerate high maintenance women, but having a baby has taken it to a new level. I'm officially at a point where I can be dressed with my makeup ready and hair done in less than ten minutes, and sure I'm usually wearing the same outfit I wore earlier in the week and my hair & makeup are staying pretty simple these days but still, I'm counting it as a success. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><b>Number three. I've learned to live without dairy.</b> </span><br />
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">This one is painful because I'm a HUGE dairy fan but our babe was having a heck of a time digesting my breast milk, crying at every feeding, so in desperation I took the advice of loved ones and fully cut dairy out of my diet. It worked. Though I miss mac and cheese with my whole heart Eloise has been 100% happier about life so I'm sticking it out for a while until her digestive system is more developed and able to process dairy protein. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><b>Number four. I've learned to always always pack a second outfit. </b></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Because this little girl can poop!<b> </b>My friend Hillary told me yesterday that it's even a good idea to start packing an extra shirt for myself in case our lady has a poop blow out while I'm holding her. That's wisdom. Since we are on the topic I'll also say that Eloise passes gas like a grown man and it is so so funny. Literally there have been times where I heard her and thought it was Shaun. The other day she farted so loudly in church that her Auntie on the other side of our row heard it. Shaunny was so proud. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><b>Finally... Number five... </b>This lesson has come with plenty of tears and it is by far the most significant thing I'm learning... </span></div>
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<b>I am learning to embrace my limitations as invitations to grow.</b> </div>
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On the days when nothing feels normal and I'm consumed with all things baby and all I want is a shower or to get up and leave the house real quick but I know that neither of those things are possible because Eloise needs my attention and nothing ever seems to happen "real quick" anymore, I have found that I have two options. I can either get frustrated that things aren't going the way I wish they were or I can look for ways to make my new life as a Mama the best it can possibly be. I can enjoy the luxury of dry shampoo when a shower is not going to happen, or turn on great music and make my home a place I love to hang out when going out isn't feasible. I can put different systems in place so that I am a boss at leaving the house with a baby, like always having the diaper bag packed so I can just grab it and go. And those extra sleepy days that follow the extra long nights I have when our little Elle-baby wants to nurse every 2 hours? I can make myself a yummy coffee, snuggle sweet Eloise in my arms and marathon watch episodes of the Office on Netflix, because Michael Scott is hysterical, Jim and Pam are my favorite TV couple, and all of that together makes fatigue so much more bearable. </div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><b>Mostly I'm learning to just adore this stage of life that Eloise is in, knowing that in a week or two she will have already changed again and I really won't ever get this time with her back.</b></span><br />
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><b>Praise the Lord for 5 weeks of being a Mom and all I get to learn along the way.</b></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Photos by @sarahgrunderphotography when #eloise_marie was 2 weeks old. </span></div>
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Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-91576990669479393412015-07-15T22:48:00.001-07:002015-07-15T22:48:53.508-07:002 Weeks of Eloise Marie<div style="text-align: center;">Eloise will be 3 weeks old this Thursday and we are loving doing life with her! She is growing so quickly which aches my heart a little but also makes me so excited for the wonderful things to come. This weekend I was looking through my phone and realized I had lots of little clips of footage from the Eloise's life up until now so I decided to make another video. This one basically is a family video but I wanted to share it with you too so that you can continue to be a part of our lives. </div><div style="text-align: center;">Thank you so much for watching! </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/wGH04GmYxDk" width="480"></iframe><br />
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<img alt="post signature" class="left" src="http://i1225.photobucket.com/albums/ee381/JessicaHover/376d9f65-c053-4361-b16e-c83e6bec0532.png" /></div>Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-63517115887220203802015-07-06T15:09:00.001-07:002015-07-06T15:09:59.219-07:00Moving Vlog! Part 1<div style="text-align: center;">Hi friends! About a week before the arrival of our baby girl we moved out of the church we have been living in and into a house with my sister and her husband. We documented the experience so you could be a part of it! Here is part one! Hope you enjoy! </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/H-7mhosQp-w" width="480"></iframe><br />
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<img alt="post signature" class="left" src="http://i1225.photobucket.com/albums/ee381/JessicaHover/376d9f65-c053-4361-b16e-c83e6bec0532.png" /></div>Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-19849626550104822015-07-05T13:14:00.001-07:002015-07-05T13:14:14.001-07:00Labor & Delivery Vlog | part 3 of 3<div style="text-align: center;">Welcome to the world sweet Eloise Marie Hover!</div><div style="text-align: center;">Born June 25th, 2015</div><div style="text-align: center;">7 lbs. 11 oz. 21 inches long.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/H80CmTyAjGI" width="480"></iframe><br />
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<img alt="post signature" class="left" src="http://i1225.photobucket.com/albums/ee381/JessicaHover/376d9f65-c053-4361-b16e-c83e6bec0532.png" /></div>Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-33642003594730891532015-07-05T13:10:00.001-07:002015-07-05T13:10:43.765-07:00Labor & Delivery Vlog | Part 2 of 3<div style="text-align: center;">Part 2!! </div><div style="text-align: center;">Because why not experience part of your labor in Starbucks???</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/6Xu46YK9_zw" width="480"></iframe><br />
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<img alt="post signature" class="left" src="http://i1225.photobucket.com/albums/ee381/JessicaHover/376d9f65-c053-4361-b16e-c83e6bec0532.png" /></div>Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-78670922829836362102015-07-05T13:09:00.001-07:002015-07-05T13:09:27.596-07:00Labor & Delivery Vlog | Part 1 of 3<div style="text-align: center;">Shaun is an amazing video-maker and during our first day in the hospital with Eloise he whipped up three vlogs that document our delivery process. We are excited to share them with you. Here is part one! Thank you for being a part of this adventure with us! </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">PS. Having a baby is awesome. Get married and do it. That's my advice now that I've done it. :) </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/jimTrW1ZZbQ" width="480"></iframe><br />
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<img alt="post signature" class="left" src="http://i1225.photobucket.com/albums/ee381/JessicaHover/376d9f65-c053-4361-b16e-c83e6bec0532.png" /></div>Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-49656854364542882292015-07-05T12:49:00.000-07:002015-07-06T14:36:55.799-07:00One Week of Eloise Marie<div>
<span style="-webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;"></span>((Written on Thursday, June 2nd, 2015))<br />
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<span style="-webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="-webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large; text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">I have officially been a mama bear for one week today and it has somehow felt like the fastest week of my life full of the longest nights I've ever experienced. All I keep hearing from moms who have gone before me is that I need to soak up these early months of her life because though they are challenging they will be some of my favorite moments ever. So that's what I've been trying to do, to focus on the sweet parts of being a new mom & remember that the hard stuff ... Like the absence of sleep & my buck wild emotions ... will pass. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Eloise is a sweetheart baby. She has a gentle demeanor and doesn't cry much, she mostly squeaks or whimpers when she wants something. Today someone said she sounds like a baby lamb making the "baaaa" sound. Shaun and I can't seem to get anything done with Eloise around because we are so enamored by her cuteness. We photograph every minute of her day and the moment one of us walks away from her the other one is already excitedly saying, "Babe! Come look at how cute Eloise is!" And then we do. We come back and adore her. Oohing and awing over the perfection that she is. It's funny too because mostly she just sleeps. I've never in my life thought sleep was so adorable. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">We say that Eloise is "jet-lagged" right now because she seems to have her days and nights mixed up. She is up all night and sleeps most of the day, like us when we arrived to Spain. It's easy to type about but actually that part of being her mama has been really stretching for me because I am the one who feeds her during the night which means I'm up every 3ish hours, and I struggle to sleep in between that time because of anxious thoughts about her. I think last night was the first time I slept more than 3-4 hours in a 24 hour period and I woke up feeling like a brand new person. I love the daytime with her because there are people around and though I've found it difficult to nap I feel energized by sunshine and friends. Usually by the time the sun is setting I am holding back anxious tears and Shaun is praying with me and Eloise that our nights would continue to be blessed as I learn to breast-feed, and that we would all stay healthy and be able to sleep well. I don't think I've ever prayed as much in a week as I have been praying this week. I feel as dependent on Jesus as Eloise is dependent on me & Shaun to keep her alive. If we don't meet her needs Eloise will die. Literally. And if Jesus doesn't meet my needs, I too feel like i will die. Even if physically I remain alive, my heart & soul & mind & strength will be gone if Heaven doesn't bend to sustain me right now. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">I will say that every day has gotten a little easier and my emotions have continued to feel more and more normal. The emotions are more intense than before, both the good and the bad, and I cry daily for no reason, but my friends tell me that I'm normal, and even if they're lying, I appreciation the consolation. It helps. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Yesterday we had our first well-baby appointment and we literally cheered when the doctor told us that Eloise was healthy. She feels so fragile and we love her so much, all we want is for her to be healthy. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Since Eloise is sleeping as I type this and it's likely that won't last much longer I'll go ahead and wrap up this post with some final things I'll want to remember as our little darling grows. Everyone says she will change and grow quickly so this post is my attempt to bottle up this first week's goodness so we can continue to treasure it for years to come. </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">7 things to remember about 7 days of Eloise Marie ~ </span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">1) Eloise likes to pee when her diaper is off which makes diaper changing that much more adventurous. It's not uncommon to find me, Shaun & Meredith changing her diaper together to see if we can conquer the wild pee as a team. Even if she has already peed, or poo-ed her diaper, the moment she feels the freedom of no diaper she pees again. To date she has peed on our bed, our couch and on her daddy... Multiple times. One time she even pooped with the diaper off. It was hilarious but we would be okay if that stayed a one time thing. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">2) Her favorite way to sleep is on her Daddy's chest. We call it sleeping in his "kangaroo belly". We love it as much as she does because it is so stinkin cute. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">3) She is a wiggly girl. She likes to have her legs in the "criss-cross applesauce" position, as our God-daughter Lily says. And whenever she gets the chance to stretch out tall on our bed she kicks her legs like she is riding a bike, really fast, getting her little feet caught on each other with each peddle which makes a flicking sound. We love the flicking sound. We felt her doing the same movements in my womb so it is extra sweet to see her doing them now. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">4) She is a champion breast-feeder. She learned to latch quickly & by the end of week 1 has been having full feedings. Full feedings means she sleeps better too... Which means we sleep better. Praise the Lord for that. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">5) Eloise loves to be with her Auntie Meredith. Every morning Meredith comes to get her from me at around 5am after she has finished nursing and Meredith looks after her until she wakes up again around 8am. Her Auntie helps with diaper changes, burpings, bath time and she holds Eloise every chance she gets. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">6) Eloise has already been out of the house 4 times. She has been to the YWAM LA campus, Ross - Dress for Less, Starbucks, and to the barber shop to sleep while her Daddy got his hair-cut. She either rides in the stroller or her Daddy wears her in a wrap on his chest. I think she prefers being on Dad's chest. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">7) On the second night of being home with Eloise I was looking at her adorable feet and realized that they didn't get stamped at the hospital. I immediately started to cry (hormones anyone?) thinking that we needed to stamp them immediately so we could know how little they were before they grow. I literally felt panicky as if they were growing right before my eyes. (I'm laughing as I type this because of how crazy it is.) It was around 3am and I was trying to find an ink pad in our house to stamp them right that second. Obviously I didn't find one. So then I got on Pinterest and tried to find out other ways to capture a baby's footprint. Eventually I came to my senses and realized what a nut I was being so I relaxed and decided to ask Shaun & Meredith for help getting her feet stamped then next morning. They laughed at me when I told them about my 3am crazy sesh and then together we got ahold of some black paint and pretty paper and managed to stamp her little feet so I could frame the footprints and remember them forever. The footprints are precious & the whole endeavor was raging with postpartum hormones which I think is worth documenting just so I can laugh at myself some more later. </span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: inherit;">And now for some newborn photos by our incredible friend Sarah. If you don't know her you should get to know her and if you ever need a photographer you should hire her today. There's nobody better. <a href="http://www.sarahgrunder.com/">www.sarahgrunder.com</a> // @sarahgrunderphotography</span></i></div>
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Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-29314474929192238022015-06-23T14:48:00.001-07:002015-06-23T14:48:48.728-07:0038 Weeks Pregnancy Update!! (video)<div style="text-align: center;">Hi guys! We made a little video to update you on the baby growing that's happening over here! </div><div style="text-align: center;">She could come any day now and we are SUPER excited. </div><div style="text-align: center;">Thank you for being so wonderfully supportive! We love you & hope you are having a great week!</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/1qmZyA5N6mQ" width="480"></iframe><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Yesterday I was thinking about my relationship with God and how much I have learned over the last 8 years of trusting Him. I know that many of my blog-readers don't call themselves Christians and are not so interested in hearing about things that relate to faith, and that's okay with me, but for those of you who are pursuing a relationship with Jesus I want to start sharing more directly some of the things I have learned and am learning about doing life as a believer. I don't know how often I'll do these devotional style posts, and I won't be taking a lot of time on them, so it's likely they won't be the most creative or inspiring things you've ever read. But that's okay. My purpose is simply to invite you into my journey of faith and hopefully encourage you in your own. I trust that whoever needs to see these posts will, and for everyone else, you'll just keep on keeping on. </span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: inherit;">Here's a little something on righteousness and reading the Bible... </span></i></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit;">“But let all those rejoice who put their trust in You. Let them ever shout for joy, because You defend them. Let those also who love Your name, be joyful in You. For You O Lord will bless the righteous, with favor You will surround Him as with a shield.” Psalm 5:11-12</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>I remember when I first started to put my faith in Jesus back when I was 17 years old and how I couldn’t seem to find encouragement in the Psalms because so many verses refer to how much God loves and protects “the righteous”. I knew too much about my own failures to consider myself a “righteous person”, so naturally I skipped over those verses believing that they were not about me yet but about the people who lived really <i>Christian lives</i> and made really <i>Christian decisions</i>. I thought that maybe once I had gone a few years making good Godly choices then those verses would start to apply to me, but until that time I reserved them for the other <i>more Christian</i> people in the world. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>As I started to read the Bible for myself, specifically the books in the New Testament about Jesus & His life on the earth (Matthew, Mark, Luke & John), I began to understand that God wasn’t so interested in me “acting like a good Christian”. In fact it seemed that Jesus got most frustrated with the religious people of his time because they “acted really Godly” but actually their hearts were distant from God. I was surprised to see how Jesus scolded the religious people who had track records of making, “really Christian decisions”, while He was completely compassionate and tenderhearted toward people who didn’t appear righteous at all ... prostitutes, uneducated fisherman, poor widows, tax collectors... etc. These people were more like me, they had been living Godlessly, they were failures compared to the really religious people, and yet Jesus showed them loving kindness and treated them with dignity. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>I came to discover that righteousness has very little to do with our actions and everything to do with the postures of our hearts before Jesus. When we put our faith in God, repenting of our sins and receiving the gift of salvation that He offers us through Jesus, the Bible says that we take on the righteousness of Christ. Literally, it is as if our own righteousness, or lack thereof, has been buried in the grave, and we are given a completely new life and reputation in Christ. Righteousness happens through faith in Jesus, it doesn’t come through acting perfectly, nor do we become more righteous the less times we fail, but because Jesus is perfect and He has paid the price for our sins, in Him we have complete righteousness. This enables us to relate to God with confidence knowing that He is not disappointed in us. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>God loves and protects the righteous. It’s true. And it’s also true that <i>every</i> believer is righteous because of Jesus. It doesn’t matter how much we have blown it or how many times we have failed. When we surrender our lives to Christ we receive His righteousness. This means we really can get excited when we read the Bible and see the different ways God promises His protection for “the righteous”. Those verses aren’t for other “more Christian” people. They are for us. Everyday, the stuff we read in the Bible applies to us. When we understand that, reading the Bible becomes a lot more encouraging. </span></div>
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<span class="text Rom-5-1" id="en-NLT-28010" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"><u>Faith Brings Joy</u></span></span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="text Rom-5-1" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">"Therefore, since we have been made right in God’s sight by faith, we have peace</span><span class="footnote" data-fn="#fen-NLT-28010a" data-link="[<a href="#fen-NLT-28010a" title="See footnote a">a</a>]" style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;">[<a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Romans%205&version=NLT#fen-NLT-28010a" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; color: #b34b2c; cursor: pointer; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: top;" title="See footnote a">a</a>]</span><span style="line-height: 24px;"> with God because of what Jesus Christ our Lord has done for us.</span></span><span style="line-height: 24px;"> </span><span class="text Rom-5-2" id="en-NLT-28011" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 24px;">Because of our faith, Christ has brought us into this place of undeserved privilege where we now stand, and we confidently and joyfully look forward to sharing God’s glory. </span><span class="text Rom-5-3" id="en-NLT-28012" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 24px;">We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance.</span><span style="line-height: 24px;"> </span><span class="text Rom-5-4" id="en-NLT-28013" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 24px;">And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.</span><span style="line-height: 24px;"> </span><span class="text Rom-5-5" id="en-NLT-28014" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 24px;">And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love. </span><span class="text Rom-5-6" id="en-NLT-28015" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 24px;">When we were utterly helpless, Christ came at just the right time and died for us sinners.</span><span class="text Rom-5-6" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px;"><b> </b></span><span class="text Rom-5-7" id="en-NLT-28016" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 24px;">Now, most people would not be willing to die for an upright person, though someone might perhaps be willing to die for a person who is especially good.</span><span style="line-height: 24px;"> </span><span class="text Rom-5-8" id="en-NLT-28017" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 24px;">But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.</span><span style="line-height: 24px;"> </span><span class="text Rom-5-9" id="en-NLT-28018" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 24px;">And since we have been made right in God’s sight by the blood of Christ, he will certainly save us from God’s condemnation.</span><span class="text Rom-5-10" id="en-NLT-28019" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 24px;"><span class="versenum" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"> </span>For since our friendship with God was restored by the death of his Son while we were still his enemies, we will certainly be saved through the life of his Son.</span><span style="line-height: 24px;"> </span><span class="text Rom-5-11" id="en-NLT-28020" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 24px;">So now we can rejoice in our wonderful new relationship with God because our Lord Jesus Christ has made us friends of God." Romans 5:1-11</span></span></div>
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Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-84917296298054358602015-06-12T20:09:00.000-07:002015-06-12T20:09:37.318-07:00a few maternity photos by Elsa Mesot Photography <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">When we were visiting Vevey, Switzerland last month our sweet friend Elsa surprised us by giving up her afternoon to take maternity photos of Shaun and I! Elsa is an incredible photographer and Switzerland is a dreamy place so obviously that combination makes for a completely magical photoshoot. There are soooo many photos I want to share with you, but for the sake of not bombarding you with preggo pictures I'll just post a few for now and then throughout the next few weeks I can show you some more. As of tomorrow I'll be 37 weeks pregnant which means this little lady could arrive at anytime. We'll be moving next weekend so it would be ideal if she would wait until after that, but I'm bracing myself in case she comes early. Her due date is July 4th.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">For those of you who have been waiting for our next vlogs/advice videos to come out, don't worry you won't have to wait much longer! I'm going to work on editting them this weekend & hope to have at least one new one ready for you sometime next week. Thank you SO much for your encouragement on those. Your enthusiasm helps me to stay motivated. :) </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I hope you have a great weekend! See you soon! </span></div>
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Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-53795184802799096692015-06-12T19:47:00.004-07:002015-06-12T19:48:16.916-07:00i've been getting less done. // thoughts from Barcelona. <div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 12px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">(This was written on one of my last nights in Barcelona.) <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"> I haven’t been writing on my blog much lately. In slowly plugging away at my book I feel like I only have a limited amount of creativity to put towards writing and I fear that if I direct my creative energy towards my blog then this book will remain unfinished. But tonight is different. I don’t want to write a chapter. I don’t want to refine something I’ve already written either. I don’t want to edit my thoughts or wonder how my words measure up next to my favorite writers like Bekah DiFelice and Shauna Niequist. No. Tonight I want to write as if no one is going to see this, except maybe God, and when I finish I want to be okay never coming back to assess how well I did. <span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">Right now I just want to write for the sake of creating something.</span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>For the past month I have been with family. It started with my sweet Dad coming to visit for 10 days, followed by an almost week-long visit to Switzerland to be with friends who feel like family, and then wrapped up with a week here in Barcelona with DK, Marie & baby Anna Heavenly visiting from Switzerland, and Eve & JP here from China. Among all of the amazing things I have done during this time I am also very aware that I've gotten less work accomplished. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>I have walked slower and listened longer and framed my days around the needs and desires of people I love most. I have blistered my feet venturing multiple miles each day with my Dad in an effort to see as much of Barcelona as we possibly could (literally... his first day here we walked 8 miles and the rest of the days we walked somewhere between 3-6 miles... our feet were looking pretty ugly by the end of his visit.) I have laughed like crazy hurrying along busy Spanish sidewalks with DK & Marie as we tried to find a place to change Anna Heavenly’s explosively poopy diaper before it exploded even further off of her and onto one of us. I have enjoyed a whole array of Barcelona’s benches as pregnant Eve and I waddled our baby-growing bodies through the streets of my neighborhood, sitting every few minutes to relieve one of us of some hilarious ache we’ve never experienced before. And in the name of being a good hostess I have eaten my weight in gelato, churros, horchata, paella, kebabs, fresh fruit and Spanish tortilla. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>With Anna Heavenly being almost 1 year old now <i>naturally</i> I consider her parents to be professionals, which means that I asked them any and every question I could think of about parenthood while they were here. Plus since they are like family to us, I even felt safe asking them the things I usually save for Google, you know questions like, “Will my nipples bleed while breastfeeding? Will I poop during labor? Will I have good sex after having the baby? Can I see your boobs now that you’re done breastfeeding?” (Obviously that one was for Marie...) And perhaps the scariest question for me... “Will I enjoy being a mom?” They answered every question in the best way, the compassionate way, and they didn’t make me feel stupid for asking. We talked deeply and we laughed often and just watching their family do life together was enough to fill my heart with all kinds of excitement for my own little future crew. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>On our last day together I took them to visit the famous cathedral, La Sagrada Familia. We actually called it ‘The Tower of Terror’ because although DK has a ridiculous stockpile of knowledge about pretty much everything under the sun, somehow he didn’t know that the Sagrada Familia was basically the pride of Barcelona. He revealed this to us the day he pointed to one of the the cathedral, which is visible from most anywhere in Barcelona, and said, “I think while we are here we should go visit that tower.” ... That tower? What tower? ... We were confused about what he meant ... surely he didn’t think the Sagrada Familia was a tower? ... But yes ... in true stereotypical American form... DK was pointing to La Sagrada Familia and calling it “that tower”, so after a whole bunch more laughter we agreed that while he was here I would take them to see “The Tower of Terror”. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Later that week as we walked to see the tower formerly known as La Sagrada Familia we talked some more about life with a child involved. Marie gave me some more tips on things like traveling with a baby, warning me that packing for a little one can get complicated and that every babe travels differently. Then somewhere in the conversation DK interjected by saying, “Just be ready for everything to go slower. Because doing life with a baby makes even simple things take longer.” I thought it was a good point. And an interesting one, if things move slower with a baby it probably means I’ll get less work done...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>These past few weeks my time has been spent with family, but has also been shared with the Calling All Skaters students and staff, preparing them to leave Barcelona and go to England for their final month of lectures before their 2 month European outreach begins. I have fallen in love with those skaters. They are spunky and fun, fierce, full of faith and boldness. They are carefree, enthusiastic, and they love God like crazy. They also love to skateboard and they are great at eating, which absolutely delights the Spanish people who prepare our meals each day. In helping Shaun to pastor this rowdy bundle of skaters, I have found myself with less time to get other things done. Things like writing, emailing, blogging, and video-making have all fallen behind as my attention has been given to this amazing Calling All Skaters Barcelona crew. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>As someone who thrives on productivity and struggles with perfectionism, it is usually really difficult for me to feel like I’m not producing anything. I am the kind of lady who sets goals and makes schedules and creates deadlines for myself. I have been known to feel anxious unless I accomplish what I set out to accomplish. But this past month has been different. I’ve done away with the anxious striving to perform and accomplish and I have allowed myself the space to just be present with my friends and family. And you know what I have found? It has been absolutely worth it. This past month has made me rich. All of the walks and the coffees and the fresh croissants I enjoyed with my Dad as we talked about everything and nothing; my time with Shaun in Switzerland with best friends we get to see maybe once a year; being here in Barcelona, hosting friends who feel like siblings, eating with them, laughing with them, sitting with them on random benches; and investing my time in these skaters as they learn more about God’s love for them and His purposes in their lives, these are the moments that make memories. And these are the memories that make us rich. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>DK was absolutely right when he said that having a baby will slow life down and make even simple things take longer. That is wisdom and I see it. But the more I think about it the more convinced I am that pursuing friendship and family life, in any capacity, will always force us to slow down. Because love requires a certain slowness. Being alone and independent allows us to go fast, work hard, and get things done. But being with people, in real relationships, with real depth, is only be possible if we are willing to slow down. We must be willing to go slowly enough to listen well, to communicate clearly, to know when it’s time to hustle because emergencies require it, and to realize when it’s time to sit and rest, even when we don't feel tired. </span></div>
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Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-61714669604839425112015-05-29T07:56:00.001-07:002015-05-29T07:56:02.449-07:0025 Questions for a First Date! (video)<div style="text-align: center;">Yes! We made another video! </div><div style="text-align: center;">This one is in response to you guys writing us and asking for suggestions on questions you can ask someone on a first or second date! We went ahead and had some of the Calling All Skaters crew give us their suggestions and though most of them probably wouldn't be so good on a date... </div><div style="text-align: center;">it made for a very entertaining video. :) </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">Enjoy! </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/CE51AV7eWPw" width="480"></iframe><br />
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<img alt="post signature" class="left" src="http://i1225.photobucket.com/albums/ee381/JessicaHover/376d9f65-c053-4361-b16e-c83e6bec0532.png" /></div>Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-67016885459135920062015-05-15T17:18:00.001-07:002015-05-15T17:18:30.931-07:00Be More Fun to Date Series! Part 2 - "Facebook Official"<div style="text-align: center;"><b>It's FINALLYYYYYYYYY here! </b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>The second video in our Be More Fun to Date Series! </b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">"Facebook Official"</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>Defining what it means to be "In a Relationship"!</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>Sharing 3 facts about this stage of the relationship! </b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>And ending with 3 ways to be more fun to date! </b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br /></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>It's fun and we hope it's helpful too! </b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br /></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>In our next video we will be talking about "I love you." </b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>What does it really mean? When should you say it? </b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>Stay tuned! </b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br /></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>Thank you for watching!!</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br /></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/0Fcme7KOFeQ" width="480"></iframe><br />
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<img alt="post signature" class="left" src="http://i1225.photobucket.com/albums/ee381/JessicaHover/376d9f65-c053-4361-b16e-c83e6bec0532.png" /></div>Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4731677104032822064.post-21638194735943678282015-05-08T11:46:00.000-07:002015-05-09T16:35:42.211-07:00hooray for beach day!<div class="separator" style="clear: both;">
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Hip hip hooray! I went to swimming at the beach for the first time today! </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">PS. By "first time" I mean first time this year, first time since being pregnant, and first time since being in Barcelona!</span></div>
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This is big news in my pregnant world because never in my life have I wanted to swim so badly as I have in these recent months of carrying around this little baby in my tummy. My Mama said that this is pretty normal because even though my baby girl only weighs an itty bitty amount, I am still carrying around a lot more weight than normal, so floating effortlessly in water is bound to sound heavenly! And oh my... Was it heavenly! </div>
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The water is still pretty chilly here and there was quite a bit of wind, but since it was hot outside and I felt desperate to be a mermaid, I went for it. Unfortunately Shaunny had plans with Calling All Skaters and could only join me for the first fifteen minutes of my long anticipated beach afternoon, so we just snapped a few photos and then I went swimming alone. But not really alone, because the baby girl was there too, and my sweet Dad was watching from a rock not too far away. He didn't want to be on the sand with me because he had his nice camera with him and sand can really do damage to camera lenses. </div>
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Anyway I'm sharing these photos because I think they're fun and one day when I'm old and grey I'll be excited to show my grand-babies what I looked like back when I was 26 years old and 31 weeks pregnant with their beautiful Mama in my tum.</div>
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<span style="color: purple;">In other news! We are still working on the second video in our <a href="https://youtu.be/ivD9OzD0Jl8">"Be More Fun to Date"</a> series on Youtube so stay tuned! It has gotten slightly delayed due to hanging out with my Dad who is here visiting from Korea, anddddddd <a href="https://youtu.be/Fnhwzfg7SXc">Shaun's recently broken wrist</a>. We hope to have it up by the end of this weekend. </span></div>
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<span style="color: purple;">Also I have been writing on this blog less because I'm devoting my writing time to finishing my book, hoping and praying it gets done soon! I'm sorry to any of you who are disappointed that I haven't been posting as much but I hope my absence makes you all the more excited to read my book when it is done! </span></div>
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<span style="color: purple;">Lastly, Shaun and I will be in Switzerland next week visiting our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/beautyariseschwiiz?fref=ts">Beauty Arise team</a> there and speaking at an event they are hosting on Relationships! We are SO excited about this. </span></div>
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Okay that's all for now! Thank you for stopping by and I hope you have a sunshiny and wonderful weekend! </div>
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All my love, Jess </div>
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<br>Jess Hoverhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16518030000633750761noreply@blogger.com1